The Over-exposed VS The Under-appreciated

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Guest Review of Planet Hulk


HULK REVIEW MOVIE ABOUT HULK ON PLANET SURROUNDED BY PUNY ALIENS THAT TRY TO HURT HULK, BUT HULK NOT WANT TO BE ON PLANET, ALIENS HURT HULK, HULK NOT LIKE, HULK SMASH PUNY ALIENS TRYING TO HURT HULK, HULK NOT LIKE THIS MOVIE!!!!!!!

WHY HULK ON PLANET YOU ASK, BECAUSE HULK ON PLANET FROM STUPID PUNY RICHARDS AND HIS SO SMART BRAIN TRAP HULK IN STUPID SATELLITE THAT MAKE HULK LOOK DUMB WHEN HULK JUST TRYING TO HELP PUNY RICHARDS, THANKS A LOT HULK GOOD JOB FOR TRYING TO HELP, HERES A SATELLITE TO TAKE HULK TO OWN PLANET WHERE HULK CAN LIVE PEACEFULLY BUT INSTEAD STUPID SATELLITE TAKE HULK TO BAD PLANET, GEE THANKS A LOT STUPID RICHARDS HULK ALWAYS WANT TO BE STUCK ON PLANET AND BE MADE A SLAVE TO SERVE PUNY ALIENS, GREAT PLAN STUPID.

HULK SMASH NASA AND STUPID SATELLITES!!!

HULK ALWAYS WANT TO BE GLADIATOR ON ALIEN PLANET AND BE SHOT AT BY STUPID MAGIC, SO HULK GUESS THAT HULK GET WHAT HULK ALWAYS WANT AND EVERYONE HAPPY NOW RIGHT? HULK JUST GOING TO GO BE FORCED TO FIGHT AGAINST HULK'S WILL, NO BIG DEAL, DON'T MIND HULK, RIGHT, DON'T WORRY ABOUT HULK AS PUNY PINK ROMAN ALIENS FROM BAD PLANET TRY TO KILL HULK FOR NO REASON AND BE JERKS LIKE THIS IS ROME WHEN ITS REALLY A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PLANET, WHAT KIND OF STUPID MOVIE IS THIS?

HULK SMASH RUSSELL CROWE!!!

AND WHO IS HORSED FACED THUNDER GOD SUPPOSED TO BE ANYWAYS HULK ASK? WHERE IS SILVER SURFER? WHAT KIND OF CRAP MOVIE TRYING TO PULL HERE? HULK UNDERSTAND MOVIE NOT FITTING EVERYTHING INTO ITS PUNY RUNNING TIME, BUT WHY MOVIE HAVE TO START MAKING STUFF UP FOR NO REASON, DOES MOVIE EVEN KNOW HOW TO READ?

HULK WISH MOVIE HAD CHILDREN SO HULK COULD KICK THEM IN THEIR PUNY HEAD OR STOMP ON THEIR TESTICLES SO MOVIE COULD FEEL HULK’S PAIN BECAUSE  THAT’S THE PAIN  HULK HAS WAKING UP EVERY DAY, YEAH.

 
HULK SMASH "IRON MAN" MIKE TYSON!!!

ONE GOOD THING IS THAT PUNY BANNER SMART ENOUGH TO NOT SHOW UP AND LET HULK BE HULK FOR LONGEST TIME, HULK FEEL GOOD STRETCHING HULKS LEGS, HULK BET PUNY BANNER GLAD BANNER HAS HULK TO HANDLE PESKY ALIENS, NEVER MIND FACT THAT ITS HULKS FAULT HULK ON PLANET TO BEGIN WITH, CUT HULK SOME SLACK WHAT ARE YOU HULK'S MOTHER????

HULK SMASH "IRON MAN" IRON MAN TOO!!!

SO HULK END UP SAVING STUPID PLANET BECAUSE HULK NOT REALLY HAVE CHOOSE NOW DO HULK? HULK FIGHT GIANT UGLY MONSTER AND SMASH MONSTER, HULK FIGHT PUNY ALIEN GLADIATORS AND SMASH PUNY IDIOT GLADIATORS, HULK FIGHT ROBOTS AND WEIRD ZOMBIE SPORE BUGS AND HULK FIGHT BIG EVIL DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS LADY AND HULK SMASH STUPID ROBOTS AND ZOMBIES AND HULK SMASH STUPID LADY!!!

THEN HULK FALL IN LOVE WITH LADY AND BECOMES HAPPY WITH LADY, ITS HULKS FIRST TIME, BE GENTLE WITH HULK.

HULK BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER LOV.. HULK MEAN HULK SMASH CHER!!!! 

HULK GO ON LONG EPIC ADVENTURE, WITH HULK SAVING ENTIRE PLANET AND MAKING FRIENDS WITH SOME OF THE PUNY ALIENS THAT HULK ADMITS ARE NOT SO BAD, THE DAY IS SAVED AND HULK PROVE DESTINY, EVERYTHING IS RIGHT IN THE WORLD, AND HULK IS IN LOVE AND EVERYONE IS HAPPY AND THEN BOOM, RICHARDS SATELLITE EXPLODES AND KILLS ALL OF HULKS NEW FRIENDS, HULK NOT KNOW HOW RICHARDS GET SUPERHERO STATUS BUT HULK NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT FANTASTIC RICHARDS ASKING FOR HULK TO HELP OUT AND THEN TRAPPING HULK IN SHIP AGAINST HULKS WILL AND SENDING HULK TO HOSTILE PLANET AND WAITING FOR HULK TO FIND THAT ONE LITTLE PIECE OF HAPPINESS THAT WOULD MAKE ALL THE PROBLEMS OF HULKS LIFE WORTH IT BEFORE KILLING EVERYONE HULKS CARES ABOUT AND WHEN HULK GETS BACK TO EARTH HULK GOING TO FIND RICHARDS AND HIS STUPID FRIENDS AND TEACH RICHARDS HE SHOULD HAVE LEFT HULK ALONE!!!!!

HULK SMASH PLANET EARTH!!!

MOVIE GET ??? OUT OF 10 BECAUSE HULK SMASH DVD BEFORE HULK COULD FINISH MOVIE.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Funny Games 5-10

So I caught around 10 minutes of, what I think was like 
30 to 40 minutes into, the movie Funny Games playing 
on some movie channel the other day and from what I 
can tell, the whole movie is about these two guys going 
into a house for no reason and pretty much doing 
whatever they feel like to this family that doesn't even 
try stop them from murdering everyone while being 
really awkward, leading me to the conclusion that 
Funny Games is pretty much just some german guys 
making the anti-thesis to the movie Home Alone.

 AHHHHHHHHHHH

Leave it to stupid Germany >:(
5 out of 10